I bit my lip. Nicolas was just feet away from me, mowing the grass while I lounged in my hammock reading a book. He stopped when he got to me and turned the lawn mower off. 

"Hey Autumn, what are you reading?"
"Wuthering Heights." 
"Again? I have a new book I want to show you. I think you'd really like it." 
"Mm." I said, not looking up at him. 
"You know I'm going to college next year, right? I think you'll miss me." he said with a shy grin. 
"I think not." I said, slamming my book closed and standing up. 
"Where are you going?"
"Away from you." I said, coldly. I felt so bad, being so mean to him. I never showed my true feelings to anyone. I walked away, and looked back at him staring there motionless. He stared back at me longingly. I scoffed and kept walking. 

My body was in shock coming in from the hot weather and entering a cool house. I walked up to my bedroom and sat on my bed. I felt numb. I wanted him so bad. But yet, I didn't know what I wanted. I wanted to feel.
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