I. Am. An. Idiot.
Last night I found out my gay bff isn't actually all that gay.
He's bi.
And has a really weird fetish that makes me queasy just thinking about it.
Oh, and pretty sure he likes me.
Being the mature young adult I am,
to deal with this shocking revelation,
I got wasted.
Then texted his older brother,
whom I do actually like, 
quite a lot,
declaring my infatuation.
To which his brother (drunkenly, I'm sure)
replied, "Sweet! Me too! Can't wait to see you (:"
So then I woke up this morning to 13 text messages.
8 from the young one and 5 from the older brother.
The younger one is basically begging me to forget what he said,
but I really can't.
And the older one is really worried/upset
cause his younger brother's freaking out and he doesn't know if my confession about liking him was legit or not.
I'm such a shit person.
Anyway, I pretty much spilled everything to the older one and it was such a great/horrible conversation.
He really does like me too and wants to give it a try but feels really guilty.
I've decided I'm going to hell.
You know what fuck it I'm moving to Alaska or Hawaii or just somewhere to get away from this mess someone help me.
Wishing I never met either of them.
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