It's not easy for me to notice how everything changed.
I took my time to take a look at everyone's sets and I felt that I'm no longer part of the thing I used to be part of. Meaning the roleplays. I made some amazing friends there or at least I thought so. The problem is, I miss it. A lot. Unfortunately, nobody really seems to miss me.
It's normal that you don't care after some time. But I remember times when people on here would have gotten tons of messages and sets and I don't know asking where they are. Obviously, this didn't happen.
You may think I sound pathetic and that might be true. But it hurts a bit, anyway.
You know what's the worst thing? That I can't change it. I don't have enough time anymore to produce sets, to write, to talk to everybody I used to talk to. It's a matter of time, not of interest. I'd love to be part of ME or any other roleplay I noticed. Because that would mean to belong somewhere on here, to share my fantasy and to let my characters do what I can't and will never do.
It's not only the end of a Polyvore chapter, it's also the end of... well, not my childhood, but something similar. It means that evertyhing's getting serious. No time left for thinking about some characters, because it's time to finally grow up. To decide what to do with my future. You know what? That's pretty scary, believe me. Not really knowing what will happen this time next year, this big change. You might think I'm crazy, but my "timeline" on Polyvore shows that process.
I remember when I used to create sets a lot, talk to all of you, write... it was an development. And this seems to be the next step although I don't want it to end.
If you are interested in it, and even if you're not, I'll tell you something: I won't close my account. I'll keep it and come back from time to time. Although I don't really think that any of you are interested in it, or not the people I used to be close to if you can say so with sometimes an ocean between us.
So yes, this could be my last blog set. Stopping that rambling, growing up, leaving a few things behind.
If anyone read it, write a comment or whatever. Otherwise it proofs I'm right with what I said at the beginning.
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