this set is late, it was supposed to be made days ago when it still was februari.
i forgot, i tend to do that - forget things.
i hate it because it doesn't just hurt me but people around me aswell.
there is so much I want to do.
i want to live.
i want to experience.
i want it so much, and yet I always make excuses.
any kind of excuse I can find, money is the one I use the most.
why do I do this?
i keep having dreams where i'm on roadtrips with friends or a special someone. the car is packed with memories, the music is blasting from the speakers, the sun is going down and we feel so alive. i guess my brain got inspired by ke$ha and katy perry music videos, and i normally don't even listen to their music.
time is wasted on thoughts, why think when you can act.
is it because the idea is so great that the reality might not live up to the expectations?
i think that's it.
i keep pushing things away, "just give me a few more days" - days that I end up spending the same way, everyday.
i wish i could be there, and not here. anywhere.
i am proud of my home, my loved ones, myself.
it's ok to want more, something different. i've known this for a long time now, and yet.
i want to be close to someone, who do i choose?
is it even up to me? non of it is real, it's a picture created by my brain from all the feelings i have inside that wishes to come out. but i don't want to be judged - by myself.
"time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time"
this is so true, i have to start listening to it.
it's an illusion, it's ok to not be sure.
it's ok, everythings ok.
sorry for the long text, that's what happens when you're late. a lot to say in such little time.
the illusion of time that stresses me out for no reason.