ok, so this is kind of an update/rampage/rant set.
because i feel like it.
it's been a bad day...
well actually it didn't start out bad
Ok, so i've been wanting to get my hair dyed dark brown for a couple months now, and i've been patiently waiting the three months that i needed to wait until i could dye my hair again...
so earlier this week, i asked my mother if i could get my hair dyed this weekend, and she told me to ask my dad, because it's his weekend with me..
and so i did ask my dad, and he said "well is your mom ok with it?
and i said yes, because i thought considering the fact that she told me to ask him because it was his weekend, that she was ok with it...
so i said yes, and my dad told me to ask my mom if she could schedule an appointment and i asked my mom....
maybe it was just me that understood it as a yes, but i'm not the smartest person, and i know i'm not, as my parents always remind me...
anyways, i had a good day at school today, and i got home in a good mood, and i was like
"Did you call Edward and schedule an appointment?"
and she's like
and i asked why not
and she said "BECAUSE YOU DON'T DESERVE IT AND I AM NOT ALLOWING IT"
and sure we had the usual amount of arguments this week, but she was just over reacting
but it really pissed me off when she said "I'm not allowing it"
You're the one who got the f u c k i n g divorce ok? and dad has custody of me when i'm with him and he has responsibility over me which does not give you the right to control me and allow me things on his weekend and he said it was ok, and that's it
of course i didn't say any of this but it was going through my mind.
and i got all mad and she's like
"i don't want to see your face"
and i go "well nobody does around here anyways."
and then she calls my dad.
whenever she can't control me, or just doesn't want to, she will call my dad
so i just got screamed at from my father over the phone for 20 minutes, to the point where i was in tears, and then they talked some more..
i don't understand any of it.
i don't want to live with my mom, and i don't want to live with my dad.
i would rather live with my grandparents or with a friend.
i feel like this is anger from the time of the divorce to now, and it's just spilling out now
and every day i feel like my mom and brother have like a little team and i'm just the idiot who lives there with them
and my dad will just do whatever my mom says
i hate it.
i cried today.
first time in a long time.
in case you're wondering, this means no hair dye.
to make my day worse, i found out that my old "friend" deleted every single nice comment about me on facebook and made me look like an idiot by talking to myself.
i also decided i'm going to get a conch piercing, helix and nose.
my mom thinks it's dumb, and that i'm goth, but at this point i really don't care what she has to say about how i look.
thank you for listening/reading...if you did.
i don't know what i would do without polyvore...it's a place to rant and talk about how i feel at times like these...where i can say things that i would never ever say on facebook or twitter or whatever
thank you poly-people....you're much cooler than most of my friends on facebook..
i just ate a giant ice cream cake because i'm depressed.
gonna watch some Lying Game to make me feel better