So things haven't been good at home recently with my family so I haven't been able to be on here much without losing myself in my own thoughts/ breaking down in tears. Things are looking better now and I'm trying to stay positive so I made a set with a lot of Dan and Phil in it. I guess because when our family had a hard time back in April they took me away from everything negative and gave me a reason to be happy. This time, I'm not so sure.
I had my first full blown panic attack this time last night. I don't really know what else to say but It's one of the worst experiences a person can ever go though. Mine lasted for around an hour and the other hour was me hyperventilating. It's awful, I won't tell you all why as it's far to personal and it's not something I want to share on here. I hated it. I was in the corner of my bedroom screaming at the top of my voice at my worst point. I couldn't breathe right at all and made noises of pain everything I breathed. If I didn't have my phone then I would have called the police easily and I even got my money stash out and shoved it in my school bag along with my wallet and a bracelet from my boyfriend. I was ready to leave.
And my school bag is still in the same place.