stop. just stop.

Sontag - 12 Dezember 2010 -
for TEBFMS I had to use some items, and I did.
it's so weird to be in a challenge group, I haven't been for so long.
 
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WHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYME?
seriously why must guys get this ridiculous notion that they're in love with you?
and why can't they keep it to themselves and pine in secret like girls do?
and why does he have to tell everyone that he's in love with me?
and why won't he stop when I tell him to?
and why is he telling me that he's getting me a christmas/birthday present?
and why won't he listen when I say that I don't want him to?
and why does he say "but you would love it, I swear. Trust me."?
and why does he say that he'll have to work long on the gift?
and that his first "attempt" failed, and he'll try again?
and why is he freaking getting me a gift in the first place?
whyohwhyohwhy?
 
I don't even know what to do.
He honestly seems to like me. But maybe he just thinks he does because I'm like the only girl who talks to him as far as I know. . .
ughh I hate being mean, everyone thinks he's a joke, when they really don't know him. Not that I do. But I mean I guess we're friends, he is a good person and all. It's just hard trying to be nice and being friends with someone who wants something more. Like I know what it's like, okay? I know what it's like to really really like someone when they don't return the favor. So I just feel bad for him. /:
 
He's the most awkward person, like I've said before. and never in a million years what I ever expected for my boyfriend. Not that I really know what to expect, but really. I am just not the "dating" type. I wouldn't even know what to do. I'll just wait for my perfect guy thanks. And I just don't see how it's him. But part of me just refuses to even consider it could be him. I hate myself for it, but his looks really don't help either. ughh, I said it. But sometimes, I think we'd get along okay and other times I can't understand why I would ever think that. This is just not the chance I want to take. If I was sure, even partially sure, I think I could do it, but I am very far from sure.
On a side note, he freaking carries this stuffed animal thing from a video game around with him all day. (this exact thing: http://bit.ly/fka8zK) And like holds it during class. I don't even know. I'm pretty sure he wanted to give it to me, even though I don't really know what it is. But every single freaking day without fail he has that thing.
Just please, stop. freaking. I don't even know what to doooooooooooooo. I don't want his present. Everytime I even hear his name I just inwardly groan. what even. I would say it's the hardest thing having someone like you like this, but then I just feel bad because you know "at least a guy likes you". But it's really not great. not so much.
freaking eh.
 
on to other news. ahah I went to my school's hockey game tonight. There weren't any full on fights, which as I hear, is the coolest thing about hockey.
We won 12-5. I didn't think that was supposed to happen in hockey?
but yeh.
 
it snowed!!!! like 2 inches. whatevs. It is one of the best feelings to wake up and look outside to see all white. But it's gonna be a b**** tomorrow, seeing as how you have to walk between buildings every class at my school.
 
GUTE NACHT(: