ll Show Me What I'm Looking For- Carolina Liar ll
It'll be officially Sunday in like, ten minutes, so I'm posting this!
I flung my arms around Josh's neck as I kiss him lightly, pressing him against the wall of the secluded, private hallway at the Starbucks on Fifth Avenue.
Today was a shopping day of course, and is girls only, but I just /had/ to see Josh. I've never felt this way about someone in my life, I mean, I wanted to see him every day, I wanted to talk to him, I just wanted to be with him every second I could. Maybe it's clingy, and cliché of me, but I just wanted him so badly.
"You're so amazing," I say to him as I pull out of the kiss, staring at his mesmerizing face. Every single aspect of his face is perfect, it's enchanting and gorgeous, in a way I can't even describe. He just has this look to him, this different look, something that's different than the other boys I've hooked up with. And I think it's that different aspect that just makes me drawn to him.
And it's not even just his good looking face, it's his simply charming and sweet personality. He calls me beautiful, he looks at me with respect, he actually treats me like a human being and not just some gorgeous piece of ass. He likes me for me, not for the fact I'm popular. And I like that… I like that a lot.
"You're amazing," He says, a smile spreading across his face as he tucks a loose blonde wave behind my ear.
I really like him… I feel happy, I feel amazing whenever I'm with him. He gives me a type of strength, a feeling of empowerment and a warm, fuzzy feeling. And whenever we kiss, the butterflies begin all over again, and it's like I could stay there in that moment and just replay it over and over again, it's as if I could never get tired of him… ever.
I settle my head on his shoulder. I'm not even worried if anyone sees us. Besides, we agreed to all meet a few blocks over, and they shouldn't be meeting for another thirty minutes or so. For once, I could relax and just… be with him.
He strokes my hair lightly, before I pick my head up and kiss him again, softly and slowly. I never want to leave his lips, they're just /that/ amazing.
After a few minutes of kissing, I could hear my phone buzzing. I keep kissing him, ignoring it. Until finally, the vibration stops, but then the lyrics of Safe and Sound by Taylor Swift go off and I dig around in my Balenciaga bag, unattacthing my lips from Josh's.
I look at the caller ID- Ava- before answering. "Hello?" I ask as I look at Josh with a quizzical look, only to see his face is sharing the same expression.
"Kristina, where the hell are you?" She asks me frantically.
"I'm at a Starbucks," I bite my lips, tapping the heel of my bootie.
"You were supposed to be here five minutes ago!" She says and I glance at the clock, seeing that I'm past my time.
Sh*t, I think to myself. If there's anything Ava hates… it's lateness. "I'll be there in like, two seconds, I'm right down the block," I say.
"Hurry," She says with a sigh, and then the line goes dead. I slip my phone into the expensive, leather purse.
I look to Josh, giving him a quick peck, "I've got to go," I say with a sigh and he nods. "Walk me out?" I ask.
Josh raises an eyebrow, "Aren't you afraid someone will see us?" He asks jokingly.
I laugh, gently hitting his arm, "Shut up," I say, grabbing his hand as we walk out of the hallway, and out the door.
Once the door opens, the cold February breeze blows in, the cool air hitting me. I pull my jacket closer to my body, then looking at Josh.
"See you later?" I ask him and he nods, pulling me in for a final, long and lasting kiss. Even in the freezing New York cold, his kisses warm me up. He makes me forget about my worries, he makes me forget all about my dad, and all about the newbies, and all about that awful Nina, he just makes me feel so alive… he just makes me smile.
I pull out, smiling at him, and waving before I walk off, headed down the busy Fifth Avenue street, where the business men are walking, talking on their Blackberries, and the elegant, Upper East Sider women are walking, their Choos making them stand tall as their designer bags sway in the crook of their arms.
I see Ava and some of the newbies standing directly in from of Louis Vuitton, where we agreed to meet up. I wave, smiling, "Hey," I say, "Sorry I'm late," I say to them and they nod, looking at me.
I look back at them, smiling at Ava, "Where were you?" She asks me, and I shrug.
"Starbucks, I had to get a coffee," I say, shaking the nearly empty cup of low-fat vanilla latte.
She smirks, raising an eyebrow, "Were you seeing that boy?" She asks me. By now, the newbies have gone into Louis Vuitton and are looking at the Parisian luxury goodies.
I shake my head, taking a sip of what's left of the latte. "What makes you say that?" I ask her back, biting my lip.
"You have that look on your face… that sort of… glow," She says to me, looking at my face.
I laugh, "And I'm not glowing always?" I ask, raising a perfect, naturally shaped eyebrow.
"Mhm," She says, as she opens the door to the French store. "Whatever," She says and I'm kinda glad the subject is dropped.
I'm not ready to admit that we're going out… I don't want her to know. It's just not like me. I know that Ava, being my best friend would of course support me, she's be thrilled, ecstatic to find out that I'm actually settling down and letting only one boy have my heart.
But I'm just not ready. I need time to accept it and let it sink it… it's still kinda new to me, after all.
I look around the gorgeous store, the signature monogram bags popping out at me, along with the latest bag from their newest collections just screaming my name. I linger by the Almas, picking up a glossy, ruby red one and admiring it.
"Cute, huh?" I ask Ava as she walks by me, looking at the classic Top Handles.
She nods, "Very," She smiles at it. "You should get it, it matches how much your cheeks are blushing," She says and I let out a laugh.
"Good one, A, very good," I say as I look at it, running my hand over the matte, leather texture. "Can we just drop it though? It's nothing serious." I shrug, saying this as nonchalantly as possible.
I feel bad that I'm lying to my best friend, I really do, but I just want this as Josh and I's dirty little secret.
"Fine," She sighs as she too picks up an Alma, a pearly white coloured one. "But there's something about this one, K, I can feel it," She says to me, running he hands over the purse.
I blink, "Something about the purse?" I ask her.
She shakes her head, laughing, "Not about the purse, about the guy you're hooking up with." She says, looking at me.
I shrug, not saying anything but keeping the red Louis Vuitton. I wander from that room, towards the next one, where the Louis Vuitton shoes are glowing, their patent leather and LV logos illuminating in the bright light that's shining on them.
But then I spot Nina, who's admiring a pair of pointy-toed flats. Ugh. Leave it to her to ruin my entire shopping day now.
I still go over of course. I'm stronger than her. No words, nothing she could say to me could get to me. It's cliché of me to say that, but I'm not going to let it get to me. I'll fight back, I'll make sure mine and Ava's thrones are saved. And if I can protect our spots on top, then, that's all that matters.
"Hm, are you gonna buy a pair of actually /matching/ shoes?" She asks me, and I could feel her gaze on me.
I pick up a pair of braided, high-heeled sandals, they're from the brand new spring/summer collection I notice. And they're gorgeous. I hold them in my hands, then turning to Nina, ready to finally respond, "Do you think I care what your opinion on my style is?" I ask her, looking at her challengingly and raising an eyebrow.
"Well, judging by the way you shifted the second I called you out, I think you do," She says back to me snarkily, "Insecure much?"
I let out a laugh, "Me? Insecure?" I ask her, laughing still as I look at her. "You've got to be f*cking kidding me b*tch."
"Hmph," She says, ignoring me as she turns away, her nose in the air as she walks to the luggage. I roll my eyes, "Crazy b*tch," I mutter under my breath.
I grab a pair of new, patent leather sling back wedges, the LV monogram imbedded in the leather. They're gorgeous. Luckily, shopping could always help me get over a b*tchy encounter.
I meet up with Ava, who's looking at some of the newer bags, mostly from the fall and winter collection, "What happened with you and Nina?" She asks me, keeping her eyes on a monogrammed clutch.
"She asked me if I was going to pick up a pair of matching shoes, I challenged her by asking if she thought I cared, she called me insecure, I laughed and said that she's got to be kidding me and then she waddled away, nose in the air," I shrug, and Ava laughs.
"Did you call her a b*tch?" She asks me and I nod.
"I had to!" I laugh and Ava laughs along with me.
"That's my girl!" She says as she picks up a bag, examines it, then walks towards the register, where some of the girls are lined up too, making their final purchases, and some already have their Louis Vuitton shopping bags in hand.
"Thank you girls!" The friendly, assistant says to us as we exit the store.
"Where to next?" Nina asks, sounding bored.
"Barney's," I answer immediately and Ava nods, "Barney's" She agrees and we begin walking.
The traffic and bustling of the city is only cooling down now, people part like the Red Sea as I walk down the street, my head held high, my 5'10 frame elongated and elegant as I strut down the street. All eyes are on me, they're on us, Ava and I. We lead the pack of girls, until we reach Barney's.
I push open the door, inhaling the scent of fine designer perfumes, and leather goods.
I immediately head over to a rack of couture dresses, f*ngering the delightful fabrics- silk, satin, velvet, cotton, and every fabric in-between.
The day ends in a whirlwind of different clothing option, b*tchy remarks from none other than Nina, and of course a lot of money being spent.
At the end of the day, this is my life, and I am loving it.