Okay, so this set is from... A LONG TIME AGO but it was in my drafts waiting for this story to be written, I wrote this a while after I made the set, when SGHRP was still going & I didn't have internet. So, it's sort of roughly done. 
Some details may have changed but I don't feel like fixing it. lol

@vintagevampire19-dear-porcelain 

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Song For Set: When It Rains - Paramore [yes, I've used this before, shut up]
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I was never really sure how I would react in the event of a tragedy, but there I was, in the wake of an unfathomable time in my life & I was actually feeling almost nothing at all. I stood in the doorway of what was once my home, staring at everything as if I'd never seen any of it before. Every surface was covered in ash or burned so far beyond recognition that I didn't know what everything was a wreck. Everything except the only room in the house I'd only ever been in once. Fendrel's office. Not a book was off the shelf, not a single paper was blown out of place. It looked as if he was still there.

It had been almost a month since the attacks & I honestly didn't think I'd ever really feel the shock. I knew normal people would feel sad & cry every moment possible, but nothing was happening to me, feelings-wise. Having my father die should have been so much more emotional, but all I could do was sit & stare into space. I'd think about him for hours; his smell, his laugh, the way he did things the muggle way so often, his smile. Yet, no matter what memory or thought popped into my head, I never felt the heat of tears or the flush of an on-coming breakdown. I would tell myself over & over again that it was just a momentary shell-shock, but if after a month, I wasn't feeling a thing, then how could I be so sure I ever would? 

I treaded lightly over the morrocan rug in Fendrel's office & made my way to his big tan leather chair in the corner of the room, picking up a stack of papers on my way. I sat the stack on the side table to my right & sank down into the chair, wrapping myself in my foax fur blanket that I'd found lying in the living room; one of the only untouched items in my home. I folded my legs up in front of me & picked up a small group of papers that were bound by a paperclip. They were just sitting on his desk neatly, with the heading FOR VESPER on the front, across a blank piece of beige paper. It seemed like he somehow knew what was going to happen & he /was/ an Auror but I wasn't sure if he'd been expecting it for a while or if he laid them out for me in a panic, either way, it was unsettling.

The first few papers were the arrangements for what Fendrel wanted his funeral to be like, they'd been updated as recently as 3 months ago, which made my stomach leap into my throat a little. As I continued to flip through pages, things were in more & more detail, things about my parents, Fendrel's past, ect. I never asked what he did for so long when he would lock himself in his office for hours, but now I was getting the picture. He wasn't payed for his Auror skills anymore so he was doing all this on his own. I couldn't help but think of what he would have said if someone else had been killed & not him. He would start speculating & go off on a hunt to find them, that was just the man he was. He was pure through & through. I could have never asked for a more amazing guardian through life, even if he did leave me too soon.

The last page in the stack held an entire letter, front & back, addressed to me directly in Fendrel's handwriting. It wasn't about his death or anything morbid but I still felt my heart sputter wildy as I read...

Dear Vesper, 
If you are seeing this, then you have invaded my office, possibly because I have died. But as so many times before, I'm not going to try & stop you. No, this time I would very much like for you to take your time & look around. It is past the time when I should let you in to my little world & I should not have kept it from you for so long, maybe we could have finished my many projects together. As you will find by looking around, I have left a lot of information for you that I have compiled for the occasion of you asking about yourself one day. I would like to share a few things with you now, & as I don't have much time, it won't be everything I've ever wanted to tell you, but the most important things right at this moment. The first thing I want you to know, is that you are %100 an Metamorphmagus. You may already be aware of the fact, but I wanted you to know for sure, without question. When you were younger, I had your blood tested &, well, you know the result obviously. The second thing I want you to know is, I was murdered but I don't want you to think it was anything to do with you or your parents. I've felt this for a long time & I've been preparing for a while now. The third & last thing I want you to know is, I leave you happy & fulfilled in my life. I loved you very much, my dear & I wouldn't change anything, even my untimely death. You may mourn or you may be angry, but I want you to know that I did not fear death & I made sure to take care of everything for you to make it as easy as possible. My wonderful daughter, you were the only person that could ever tell me what to do or make me eat healthy & I thank you for all the wonderful years we had together, though I wish we had a few more. This is not to the end even though I've gone. For you, this is the beginning of a whole new part of your life where you get to experience things on your own. I will never fully leave you dear & know this, if you ever want to speak to me, just look around from time to time & I shall be there. Know this though, I cannot be there every time you wish. I have chosen to stay behind for you only as long as you need me. So this isn't a goodbye, it's a see you another day.
Love, Fendrel

My eyes had begun swelling & tears were streaming down my cheeks on both sides, with no intention of stopping. After this long, my body had finally caught up with my thoughts. I let my head fall onto my knees & sobbed until I couldn't cry anymore. I eventually fell asleep from the exhaustion of being so overwhelmed with grief even though I knew Fendrel wouldn't want me to. He'd want me to celebrate him being around & not mourne him leaving. But I just couldn't stop myself once it started. My mind raced with dreams of him coming back only to be ripped from me once more; to be murdered one more time by another ravenous, heartless vampire only moments before I arrived, unable to do a single thing to help. My tears would start up again as I slept, I'd feel them roll down my face & leave a hard streak of salt on my skin. Then there was nothing but black as my mind was finally at peace & let me drift off into nothingness where I was happier. 

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Part 2 will come when I make the set. Lol.

-Juli <3
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