I am an ICU nurse and have cared for children and their families for 40 years. It is so very hard when we lose a child or infant. If we have cared for them for a long time and know the family well - it is as though they are part of our family. Those times we can be supportive just by being there with them . . . . and by talking about the good times or the silly times we all had together . . .and be thankful for each and every moment we had with the child. They all enter into a special place in my heart and I am better for having known them. I keep in touch with several of the moms; sometimes for years. Many of them come up to our floor at Christmas time (after their child has gotten his or her angel wings) and help us wrap gifts for the children who will be in the hospital over Christmas (this is something they did with us for several years while their child was in the hospital) and at this time one mom in particular said that all the people in her family and friends think that now that 3 months or 6 months ,etc. have gone by she should be over it and they are glad to not have to talk with the parents of the child about it. It is so very uncomfortable for some people to talk about this because it often times hits very close to home OR we can't imagine how we could survive it if it happened to us. Yet the parents so often still have the NEED to talk about their child. We laugh about the silly things that happened while they were in the hospital and about how special they were. We often introduce the mom's who come up to do this to other moms who are there for the same reason and they become a support system for each other. We have a Remembrance Ceremony once a year for all the families who have lost children that year and often families from past years continue to come and they develop a wonderful network with each other. I know I am rambling . . . sorry. part 1 sarah